While I fully intend to have this blog contain humorous elements (I can't help it since I have that sort of personality), I feel I have an obligation to state directly how horrible anxiety disorders can be, so that there is no misunderstanding. Don't take any lighthearted tone as making less out of the subject, or somehow not being true to how awful it can be. I know it's awful, it is debilitating and too painful to describe - my anxiety has driven wedges into my interpersonal relationships, limited my life, trapped me in my house (sometimes in my bed), nearly lost me my job, and eventually fueled the depression that drove me to contemplate suicide. So I get it ... trust me.
But while I struggle every moment of every day with this, I'm not despairing anymore. Not to say I might not end up in a major depressive episode again, but I've come a long way, and done a lot of healing. If you are still on the early part of that path, I hope some of these posts will show you how I managed to get past some terrible times, and also show you that there is definitely a good life to be had, even with anxiety. It does not have to rule you, you don't have to live in constant pain, there is treatment, tools, options, experiments to try, and successes to be had.
And most of all, that this blog is about LIVING with anxiety, not dying from it. I am sure as &@%$ not going to let it kill me - not now - I've worked too @#$% hard.
That said, part of how I cope is the use of humor. That's how I have always been. If you think humor and pain don't mix then you probably haven't seen 'Annie Hall', or any other Woody Allen for that matter.
Come to think of it, I don't actually like Woody Allen's humor :)
Your Hostess With Neuroses
Saturday, March 29, 2008
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